I remember times we went shopping and I tried on something cute or stylish, I would ask myself if David would like it. My relationship with my son was starting to feel exciting and inspiring. Now that he had grown up, we were relating more as a man and a woman enjoying each other’s presence and company. And I will admit, I was hungry for a man’s attention. I loved the feeling of his eyes on me when I knew I looked good, or feeling my breasts pressed against his strong chest during those moments when he hugged me.
Amanda and I knew they were drinking and maybe even smoking a little pot, but both of our sons seemed to know to keep it in balance. I never saw David overdoing it or even appear to be intoxicated, truthfully. I’m still a mom and I would wait up for him when he was out late. I just stayed in my bedroom, and when I heard him come home I’d just go downstairs and say goodnight to him.
I was beginning to miss the time that we were spending together in those first weeks before Robbie came back, so I was very pleased when David said one evening he was just going to stay in and asked me if I wanted to watch a movie. It was late afternoon, and I was just finishing up my work for the day when he texted me.
Hey mom, I was thinking of just staying in tonight. You want to watch a movie later?
Sure 🙂 That sounds good baby. Did you eat yet?
Yeah I’m getting a bite to eat now with Robbie. Want me to bring you anything?
No, I’m ok. I have food here. I’ll see you later.
See you later. Love you mom
K.. LOve you too baby
Why did I feel like teenage girl about to go on a date? My heart fluttered and I had butterflies in my stomach. My rational brain wasn’t putting two and two together that I was becoming romantically attracted to my own son but my body was releasing the right chemicals and I was going on auto-pilot. I just knew that I felt happy and excited. I loved my son and I loved being around him. There didn’t need to be any more to it than that.
Amanda called as I finished eating a light dinner to see if I wanted to get together that night but I told her I planned on staying in and watching Netflix with David. We chatted as I cleaned up the kitchen. I heard David come in. He was dressed as if he had been running or at the gym.
“Hey mom,” he said as he walked into the kitchen. “I’m just going to take a shower and get comfy and chill for a sec and then we can watch a movie.”
“Sounds good baby,” I said as I smiled at him. As he walked past, he bent down and kissed the top of my forehead affectionately before heading upstairs to shower. I could smell a mixture of sweat and deodorant or cologne and I thought it smelled great and very manly. I got off the phone with Amanda and went to get cleaned up too.
As I showered, I used a razor to tidy up my legs and under my arms. I hadn’t been dating or having sex so I didn’t shave completely down there very often. I had a little patch of pubic hair which I kept trimmed and short for cleanliness and comfort’s sake. I just shaved around the sides to keep it tidy. I used my favorite moisturizing body wash that kept my skin baby smooth and soft. I didn’t wash my hair, because it was already clean and I didn’t want to sit with it being wet and feeling cold. I had already washed my face and taken off my makeup before I showered but as I looked in the mirror, I decided to put a tiny bit of makeup back on. I was an artist with the ‘no makeup’ makeup look. People would compliment me and say, “You look great without any makeup on!” but I was wearing some. It still looked very natural, and I put on some chapstick just to give my lips a little bit of shine.