I knew Eddie was right. The conjoined personas of Anna and Donna in my reverie about last night’s sexual encounter was probably telling me something. I knew that I was consciously evaluating my relationship with Donna but maybe I’d already subconsciously concluded that assessment. I still felt a reluctance to trust that assessment. We’d only had a few dates and my natural analytical tendencies were screaming at me. I hoped that I could reason with those tendencies. I was on a slow boat heading toward Donna and I would get there when I got there.
I gathered myself and wiped my eyes with the back of my hand. Eddie felt the tension and tried to change the subject. “Good news. I think I’ve found a place to rent short term and then I’m going to rent a place up the lake for the winter. There’s no way I’m going back to the city after meeting Sylvia. I’m gonna stick around to see if there’s any chance there.”
I welcomed the chance to divert the conversation away from me. Eddie told me about how Sylvia had explained that she’d had a hysterectomy a couple years ago and she obviously couldn’t have kids. He could tell that I already knew. He said, “I was about to suggest that she could adopt, but I got the sense that she either didn’t want kids or she thought she was too old to start. I’m not hard over on kids so I was glad I hadn’t said something to make her think I wanted kids and she didn’t. I really like her Jack-O.”
I was happy for him. He was on cloud-nine, at least for the moment. By Eddie’s own admission, he had flitted from romance to romance. Some just ended like many romances do and others were ended by a transfer to some other Air Force base around the world. None came close to marriage. He was always envious of my relationship with Anna.