Son dates his mother for her birthday

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“You deserve to be spoiled, and if not by me…then who?” I looked into her eyes and offered another bite. “After all, you wound up pregnant with me when you were fifteen, and you could have aborted me, but you didn’t. Not even when my father disappeared… You’ve sacrificed a hell of a lot, to have me and raise an ‘oops’, all on your own, and that deserves more than just a little spoiling!”

Mom turned to look directly at me, and a dark furrow creased her brow as a brief glint of anger flashed in her emerald green eyes.

“Jonathan Michael Cooper, I’m pretty sure I’ve told you before,” she spoke the words slowly, and with emphasis, “but – in case I didn’t – you were NOT an ‘oops’! You were the BEST birthday gift I’ve ever received! And, there’s that old phrase, ‘the gift that keeps on giving’? Well, you’ve kept on giving me joy and happiness, and amusement and amazement, for the last 18 years. Nothing anyone could buy me, from a store, could ever top that!”

“Well, then be amazed and amused with this magical breakfast,” I smiled at her, my heart warming at her comment.

“I should, but I can’t help thinking about all the calories,” she chuckled.

“We’ll burn most of them off of you, today, Mom,” I assured her. “As soon as you finish eating and get yourself washed and dressed, we’re off to the mall,”

“Isn’t this enough?” she asked, waving her hand at the tray on her lap.

“No,” I shook my head. “You are always buying ME stuff but nothing for yourself. We’re going to spend the better part of the day fixing that! You’re a beautiful woman, and you deserve beautiful things,” Mom tried to protest, but I kept shoving sweet delicious fruity goodness into her mouth. Finally, she surrendered.

After I had stuffed her stomach with all it could hold she reached over me for the pack of Marlboro 100 cigarettes on her end table, I beat her to it. At first the look she flashed me was stern as if she was about to tell me that I was not old enough, then she seemed to remember what day it was and she leaned back giving me a grin. “Go ahead, if you want.”

I was around 14 and she had driven us out to the lake so we could watch the lunar eclipse over the water. We’d been laying on our backs, the water lapping at our feet, when she pulled a pack from her pocket and took out a cigarette. Placing the filter between her lips she flicked a 75 cent purple lighter purchased as we filled the gas tank. Her breasts rose and fell with each drag. I’m pretty sure that had been the moment of my first erection, watching her smoke in the moonlight… Since that day I have been bugging her to let me try one but the answer was always the same, wait until you’re 18. Well today, I’m 18.

I pulled one out and held it in my lips as I’ve always watched her do and struck the lighter with my thumb. Touching flame to tip I inhaled….I doubled over the edge of the bed, holding the cigarette far away until mom snatched it from my hand. I swear I heard her giggling as I coughed and hacked away.

“How do you do it?” I asked holding a hand to my burning chest.

“I’d been seeing this really hot-looking guy, around the halls. I really wanted to meet him, but it seemed like he was always with this mixed group of guys and girls, and I didn’t want to barge in, just to introduce myself. I mean, what if he was with one of the girls, in the group? I’d have been so freaking embarrassed!”

“So, one day, I saw him – standing by himself, smoking – out back of the gym. This was my perfect chance to meet him, but I drew a blank on what to say, to break the ice. I got desperate, and finally saw that he was standing right next to this big “No Smoking” sign. So I walked over and threatened to report him, for smoking there. He asked me if there was anything he could do, to keep me from squealing to the principal on him.” She paused, to take a drag from her Marlboro, leaving me hanging! How dare she?

“And you told him…?” I prompted her.

Mom smiled at me and ruffled my hair.

“I looked him in the eye and, with my sweetest ‘cute girl’ expression, I pointed at his cigarette, and said, ‘Teach me?'”

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