My first time

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I gave him a self-assured look that I very clearly wasnt feeling inside.

I’ll put my cards on the table, Anthony. It’s either going to be you, or my second choice, but one way or another, this is gonna happen.

I hadnt thought this through enough for there to even be a second choice, but he didnt know that, and hopefully, he wouldn’t call my bluff.

He paused for a few moments as he thought.

I’m taking my life into my own hands here, but okay.

I gave him a big flirty smile. Victory!! It also taught me a valuable lesson that Ive used many times thereafter. If you appeal to a man’s base instincts, more often than not, you’ll get what you want.

**********

Day One

It was Monday and I agreed to meet Anthony after school at his house. It really was the perfect location because he was an only child, and his parents both worked.

I felt bad lying to my mother, but under the circumstances, I really didn’t have much of a choice. I told her there was a new tutoring program after school in the library and I could get the service hours I needed for the National Honor Society by assisting other students. She loved that I was helping my peers and agreed to let me do it, as long as I was home for dinner. It was perfect because it gave me a solid two and a half hours where no one would question my whereabouts.

The only problem with my perfectly devised plan was my very nauseous stomach that was in no way cooperating. I was so nervous and apprehensive; I knew if I didn’t settle myself down, I was going to vomit. Needless to say, it was very difficult to get through the day. I found it nearly impossible to concentrate in my classes, and even Jenna and Erica’s sex talk and snide comments didn’t seem to bother me.

Mel, are you sure you don’t want to go to the nurse? Danielle said, with a concerned look in her eyes during our math class.

No, I’ll be fine. I think I just ate something bad for breakfast.

Your face actually has a green tint to it.

Just get your math problems done Miss nosey, I said, while gently rubbing her thigh.

She gave me a soft smile, shook her head, and got back to work. She was right, though, I probably should be in the nurse’s office. I was just hoping I had the guts to go through with this.

**********

I very hesitantly knocked on Anthony’s back door. Even though he lived a block over, we thought it would be wiser for me to use the backdoor instead of the front, just in case somebody we knew walked by.

I watched as the door opened.

Hi Melanie, come on in.

I stepped inside and we walked through a small hallway, past the washer and dryer, and into the kitchen.

Do you want something to eat, or drink?

Eat? Do you want me to vomit all over you?

No thank you, I’m fine.

A few moments of very awkward silence passed.

Would you like to ummm… watch TV?

Oh my, God Anthony, are you trying to kill me?

No, lets just you know ummm

Okay Melanie, I’ve got to be honest with you, it normally doesn’t happen like this. Ive never had a girl just show up at my back door and then want to get laid, you know?

I looked down feeling deeply embarrassed.

Maybe this was a bad idea.

I’m sorry Anthony, I… you know… this is my first time and I I have no idea how this is supposed to work… and I’m incredibly nervous, but I didnt mean to weird you out or make you feel uncomfortable… its just that

I was seconds from breaking into tears.

He took my hand and looked into my eyes.

Melanie stop. It’s okay, and I’m sorry. Cmon, follow me.

He continued to hold my hand as he led me out of the kitchen and into the living room. I would love to describe their furnishings, decorations, and wall colors, but honestly, I didn’t even look. I felt nauseous and dizzy and I was hoping I wouldn’t pass out as we walked up the stairs and into his bedroom.

We faced each other and looked into the other’s eyes for several seconds.

I’m going to get undressed in the bathroom, he said. Why don’t you get undressed and then get under the covers, okay?

Okay.

I watched as he walked out of the bedroom closing the door behind him.

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