My wife is sleeping with who?

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So when noon rolled around, I sidled over to Henry and asked him if there wasn’t something else we could do rather than traipse after my bored tour guide. Henry’s face actually reconfigured itself into an expression I thought might be a smile. We made our excuses to my guide and Henry led me out to the car and off to another local eatery outside the reservation.

Over lunch I asked him if there was anything to see in the area. “For sure,” he said. “There’s some might pretty country about a half-hour drive from here, if you’re willing to get off the main roads.”

That sounded good to me – at that point almost anything would have – so I eagerly agreed. Accordingly, after lunch I found myself going west northwest from Oak Ridge to Frozen Head State Park. When I asked Henry about the odd name, he told me it came from the main peak, which was often snow-covered in the colder months of the year.

We were already traveling on an old state highway when we turned north toward the little town of Petros, where the park entrance is located. Once we got to the park our car started climbing as the highway turned into a series of curves and switchbacks snaking their way up the side of Fork Mountain. The posted speed limit was 10 mph, and given the icy conditions and the sharp curves, I thought even that was excessive.

The park was mostly filled with deciduous trees, and with no foliage to block the view, the vistas were impressive. Henry kept pointing them out to me every time we came to an overlook, so perhaps that was why he didn’t spot the SUV that overtook us and started to pass.

Only it didn’t pass us, it suddenly rammed into the side of our car. “Sunovabitch!” Henry yelled and yanked the wheel to the right, but the other vehicle came right with us and slammed into us again. As our tires went off the pavement, Henry fought the wheel, and for a second I thought he was going to regain control. Then the world turned topsy-turvy as our car flipped and rolled.

When the view through the windshield finally stabilized, we were on our back like a stranded turtle and I was groggily hanging upside down, held in place by my seatbelt. Movement in front of us caught my eye, and I struggled to make sense of the upside-down view. After a moment I saw the SUV that had sideswiped us pull into the entrance of a jeep trail up ahead, then back up and turn around. “He’s coming back to finish us off,” I yelled. Henry was still cursing and struggling to free the big automatic he carried.

Then as the SUV began to gather momentum towards us, a second car flashed passed us like some crazed moonshiner and barreled straight for the SUV. Instinctively I closed my eyes, waiting for the terrible crash, but at the last minute the SUV driver must have chickened out and wrenched the wheel away from the impending collision. I guess he lost control because the SUV flipped and rolled over the edge and down a ravine. I couldn’t see what happened, but I could hear the noise as the car grated against the rocks and then smashed into the huge old-growth trees below.

The second car had skidded to a halt beside the point where the SUV had gone over. Then a figure came running towards us, and to my surprise I realized it was a woman. She was wearing jeans, a leather jacket and tall boots, and her dark hair was cut short and combed straight back on her head. But I stopped admiring her when I noticed the vicious-looking combat knife in her hand. “Now she’s coming after us!” I thought and resumed struggling to free myself.

The woman ran up to Henry’s side of the car, knelt down and reached through the shattered window to cut the straps to his seat belt. As Henry wriggled his way out through the window, she came around to my side and prepared to cut me free as well. “Better grab onto something,” she said in a voice with just a hint of an accent, “otherwise you’re going to fall on your head.”

I reached down (up?) and grabbed the car seat, but I still landed awkwardly when she sawed through my seatbelt. She started to pull me out of the car, but suddenly jerked away as she spotted something. I looked up to see Henry’s head disappear as he clambered down the bank where the SUV had crashed.

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