Photographer son, designer sister and model mom

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“You kids behaving yourselves?” Mom asked, startling the both of us as she took a seat.

“Welcome back, Mom.” Kelly said as she munched on her fries. She began wiggling in her seat. “We were just talking about y-”

“Everything okay?” I interrupted.

Mom looked up to me and put on her smile. “Yeah. It was just your father.”

“You were gone a while.”

“I know. We were trying to work something out.” It was tough to tell in the low light, but her cheeks appeared a little flushed. “His meeting went well and they are out celebrating.”

“Well that’s great, right?” I said.

“Mm-hmm,” she nodded and finished off her beer. She seemed somewhat distracted. Then, suddenly, she sat up straight. “So have they announced the results?”

I blinked.

“Not yet,” Kelly replied looking around the room. “I don’t see the guy anymore. Maybe there’s a couple more tables somewhere.”

“Goodie,” Mom said as she poured the last of the pitcher in the glass. “So what were you kids talking about while I was gone?”

“Not much,” I said with a shrug.

“Yeah,” Kelly said. “Oh, except I was just telling Jason about how I helped sh-”

“Ladies and Gentlemen, the results are in,” the announcers’ voice bellowed across the tiny pub.

He read off the answers, and we followed along to the best of our ability. Our responses were pretty much what we expected, though we were pleased with a two impulse answers that much to our surprise turned out correct. In the end, we were sitting pretty with fourteen correct.

“And now, the winners!” he called out.

One by one he listed the teams and announced their scores. I was a little surprised to hear the points start off so low. The teams were pretty amazing and ranged in creativity. There was ‘The Trivia Trollops’, ‘Kings of Kegels’, ‘Win or Lose, We Still Booze’, and many more, some being rowdier than others. Yet as he announced, we were getting more and more excited because our team name had yet to be called. And then he said it.

“And with fourteen points, we have a three-way tie for second place!” he called, leading to murmurs in the crowd. “When I call your team name, please stand up.”

Mom, Kelly and I all shared a look. It may have to be read to others like ‘Oh shit.’

“First up; My Couch Pulls out, but I don’t!” He called, leading a group of four large frat boys to stand up and cheer. I kinda liked their name.

“Next; Save a Tree, Eat a Beaver!” the crowd burst out laughing as a mixed group of four stood, clapping and throwing each other high fives.

“Finally; Ass is the New Vag!” he said as the room erupted in laughter and cheers.

We looked at each other with wide, shocked grins and slowly stood. I could feel the eyes of the crowd turn to face us. What a sight it must have been to see me beside my sister and mother, though I had a sneaking suspicion, no one knew our relations. As a matter of fact, we should be proud! I mean why not for there I stood, a young man with two incredibly gorgeous women who, according to our team name, like to keep it adventurous.

We looked at each other, cheeks flushed and border-lining embarrassed when it seemed that all at once, we shared the same thought. ‘You know what… Fuck it!’. We turned around, facing our audience and stood there, filled with pride and righteousness. It was our decision, and we’re gonna own it. Kelly had her fist in the air, nodding sternly as if to say, ‘Fuck yeah! Ass IS the new vag, bitches!’ Even our mother got behind it yelling out ‘Damn right!’ It was a sight to see.

“Alright everyone, by a show of applause, who takes home second?” Our announcer spoke. “Let’s hear it for ‘My Couch Pulls out but I don’t!'”

The crowd cheered, jeered and yelled. We too applauded, though softly.

“How about ‘Save a Tree, Eat a Beaver!'”

The sound of clapping grew the cheers intensifying.

Our announcer chuckled, turning his hand to us.

“And last, ‘Ass is the New Vag!'” he said, but was cut off abruptly by the roar crowd. A dozen or so were on their feet, including the party of Frat Boys who cheered louder than the rest.

“There you have it! The tie and second place go to ‘Ass is the New Vag!'” He cheered causing us to laugh and high five each other.

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