Fast forward. A few weeks later. Jacking off while watching porn on my computer. I stumble upon a cuckolding video and my memory brings back to mind the pieces of the puzzle. I put it together. One, two, three strikes, you’re out ! And I am turned on !
So I watch more of the same, and specially, a white wife cuckolding her husband with a well hung black man. And I start reading stories about it, and forums and blogs, and black superiority web sites. And I don’t understand. Probably because I have jealous tendencies…
A husband who loves his wife can’t let her be used like that by a black man. Impossible. And yet, not taking into account the video-clips who are 90% acted, or fake, I can’t deny that some of the amateur, homemade movies seem real life clips and most of the stories on forums and blogs can’t all be false. I have to face the fact that some men do, let their wife, or encourage their wife to cuckold them. I still don’t understand.
Then I compare my couple to the “cuckold’s” couple. Ooops. Damn !
My wife likes sex, but when she cums a lot, she LOVES sex ! She becomes insatiable.
I have an average sized penis, and I have gained weight, while my wife is still super sexy !
She never found it necessary to shave or trim her pussy for me. But she has asked me to help her cut and shave a bit of the hair ‘down there’, before she goes to the gynecologist. She says: When I lower my panties and spread my legs in front of the Dr., I don’t want him to see how hairy my cunt is.
She rarely sucks me and every time she does, she warns me the she will never swallow my cum.
She categorically refuses anal sex. I can’t even put a pinky in her ass hole.
And, finally, without mentioning the size of their cocks, she has expressed an attraction for black males…
I am confused. I know I am possessive, not a little bit, then again, not extremely jealous and green with envy. To elaborate, I don’t particularly like when strange men flirt or dance with my wife, but I don’t worry that she’s going to leave me for one of them. I don’t think I have the inferiority complex that I read about on some cuckold site. But I will concede that I am slightly insecure.
The big question is : Why do I get excited watching those cuckold videos or reading the stories and personal experiences. Because, I get turned on. A lot !
So where does that leave me ?
I am torn with the desire to experience the sexual excitement of having my wife fucked hard by a very well hung black man while I watch, And the revulsion for a situation that would very probably cause jealousy, deep anger, resentment and disgust, maybe even hatred.
I welcome any comment or advice.
Thank you
Added by Lewis